Easton's Eye - Part 8

The last part
maybe
not really
this part will
sum up the
beginning.

It feels like
an end
but I know
we are far
far from
the end.

I'm a bit
all over the place
in my mind
reflective
thinking back
but also
reflective
on where we are
today
so bare with me
this part
might just be
a little bit of
everything.

June 2011
Summer... Wow!
they were born
in the Fall
we made it through
the Winter
and Spring
was just one big
giant blossom.

I really have
no complaints
at this point
we had a contact
that fit!
We knew
Easton's Eye
was growing physically
was developing sight
and
was revealing to be
relatively healthy!

Did we really just
weather the storm?!
Comparatively, YES!
However
Life with Easton's Eye
is...
well, unpredictable.

Easton did have a
"good" Eye exam
in June.
So good that
for the first time
our PO gave us
12 weeks
until our next visit!
all we had to do was
Patch Patch Patch!
4-6 hours or
half of his wake time
as they say.

My philosophy
on patching
has always been
over patch
when we can
the full 6 hours
because
tomorrow is
no guarantee
it's a new day
a day that we
can not depend on.


By the way
unlike my philosophy
I. hate. patching.
always have
always will
there is something
that is just
not right
when I place
a freakin sticker
over my child's
sweet
beautiful
smiling
eye
yes, Easton's eye
smiles
both of them do!

And then
I witness
his voice whine
his face crinkle
his hand rub
and it just
breaks my heart
every time
every day

And then
I kiss
his forehead
and tell him
I love him
that I know
and that 
it's ok
every time
every day

Also another
side note on
unpredictable...
I told you
I'm all over
the place
September 2011
another good
Eye Report
I remember thinking
cool, I can do this
Eye exams
4 times a year
that's not so bad.
December 2011
glaucoma is back
good bye to only
four visits a year.

So yeah back to
June... well
let's just get into
July 2011
I had been reading
and commenting on other
Eye Mom's blogs
so much so
that I started to
feel and think
that my comments
were so frequent
and often so long
that they probably
were thinking
"hey quit blogging
on my blog
and get your own!"


So I did.


I needed
this space
this blog
for so many
reasons
obviously, yes
it's a place
to put all of
the Eye
down.
I had been
carrying it
holding it
all of it
and them
for so long
that it was
weighing me
down.

I needed 
the release
the freedom
the creativity
the photography
the words
the thoughts
the emotions
the milestones
the reflection
the support
the feedback
the inspiration
to get back
to me.

The beginning
of my blog
did not start
with any of
those intentions.
In fact, I hit
an emotional wall
and a reality
nightmare
in the beginning
of my blog.

Easton would
no longer allow
me to touch
his Eye
while sleeping.
I was forced
to face the contact
while he was
awake
and consequently
forced to face
my real feelings
over his condition.

Considering
up to this point
I was really good
at dismissing them
for whatever was needed
in the moment
and now
I had moments
for me
I had a blog.

So what have
I learned
from blogging
from the timeline
from the beginning
this journey
our journey
that has only
really
just begun...

Let go of expectation.
I had so many
expectations
ideas
pictures
in my mind
of how things
should go
but life will go
they way
it's supposed to go
and when you
fight it
you miss it.
Now I think more
in terms of
goals
there is more than
one way to reach
a goal.

Also that
Nothing stays the same.
No one phase
No one emotion
whether good
or bad
it's not forever.
Life goes on.
Growth
Change
Time happens
whether fast
or slow
it will go.

And lastly
I create my normal.
Normal is
what I do
and my life
what I blog
is my normal.

Ok so there
I did it
Timeline
officially
up to date!